Diet Questions Answered *Borrowed*
>
> Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong
> life; is this true?
>
> A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and
> that's it... don't waste
> them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding
> up your heart
> will not make you live longer; that's like saying you
> can extend the life of
> your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a
> nap.
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and
> vegetables?
>
> A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow
> eat? Hay and
> corn.
> And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more
> than an
> efficient
> mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need
> grain? Eat chicken.
> Beef is also a good source of field grass ( green leafy
> vegetable). And a
> pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily
> allowance of vegetable
> products.
> ---------------------------------------------------
> Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
>
> A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is
> distilled wine, that
> means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get
> even more of the
> goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms
> up!
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
>
> A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is
> one to one. If
> you
> have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a
> regular exercise
> program?
>
> A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy
> is: No Pain...Good!
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
>
> A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!.... Foods are fried these
> days in vegetable oil.
> In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting
> more vegetables be bad
> for you?
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft
> around the
> middle?
>
> A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets
> bigger. You should
> only
> be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
>
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
>
> A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!!
> It's the best
> feel-good food around!
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
>
> A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to
> me.
>
> -
> ---------------------------------------------------------------------
> Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
>
> A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
>
>
>
>
> Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may
> have had about
> food and diets.
> And remember: 'Life should NOT be a journey to the
> grave with the intention
> of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved
> body, but rather to
> skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in
> the other - body
> thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO
> HOO! What a Ride'

:happiest:

:dancehappy:

:happiest: